Get Therapy Right
/
How to
Get Therapy Right
100% of the Time
by Danielle Thurman, LMFT
Before I became a therapist, the image I had in my head for therapy was the typical client laying on the couch spilling their guts. The therapist was sitting next to the couch with a clipboard. I am sure you know the picture I am talking about. A problem I frequently see happening in the therapy room is that we get stuck on how therapy “should be.” When this happens, we frequently get angry or withdraw. Clients will oftentimes randomly stop therapy when having these responses. We miss a huge opportunity for change. The reason being, you bring your individual and relational patterns to therapy. What’s happening outside therapy most likely just happened with your therapist. Your response to life situations just became your response to therapy. The old pattern becomes more ingrained.
HOW CAN YOU CHANGE THIS?
Be open and honest with your therapist. Share the thoughts going on in your head that maybe you wouldn’t normally say out loud. Those messages are the messages keeping you stuck. For example, if you feel like you are failing therapy and want to withdraw, say so. Most likely, you have had many painful life experiences where you have felt like you failed. You have learned to withdraw from those experiences or even people. Your therapist can help you create a different response by leaning into it together. We can become the team and foundation of change that you are looking for until we can figure out how to bridge that gap outside therapy.
In order to create change, therapy will have moments of discomfort. Maybe even pain at times. Changing patterns means leaning into the unknown. Therapy gives you the chance to not have to walk that path alone.
CHALLENGE:
Write down your fears. The messages that play in your head when something goes wrong. Share that with your therapist or a trusted friend.
Danielle Thurman is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist at The EFT Clinic in Salt Lake City and Lehi, Utah. She specializes in working with individuals, couples, and families in distress to help them recognize the underlying emotions that haven’t been expressed and relationship needs that are not being met. Together with Danielle you will build a relationship of connection that will help you cope with these feelings of hopelessness or loss. She will then teach you the skills to help you break these patterns outside of therapy to create the life you have always longed for.
The model Danielle uses is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). This model has some of the highest empirically supported research in helping with emotional and relationship distress. The goal of therapy is to re-build hope, trust, security, and connection. This method works for a wide array of symptoms like anxiety, depression, addiction, life transitions, betrayal trauma, etc.
If you would like to schedule an appointment with Dani, call 385-695-5949 or email dani@theeftclinic.com.